I Want a Bucket

How deep the Father's love for us
How vast beyond all measure

Last Friday, I was driving my dad's 4Runner when I accidently bumped another car from behind. The other car wan't damaged at all, but unfortuately, there is now a crushed in coke can look to the right front edge of the 4Runner. I was not thrilled, but knew I needed to call my parents who were out of town. I should say that I have never been afraid to tell my parents anyhing but nevertheless, hated to call and let them know what had happened. Through my tears, I explained what had happened and as they tried to calm me down, they remeinded me over and over that to them, the car was just a thing and I was what mattered. As long as I was okay, than everything else would be okay as well. No matter how many times I told them I was sorry and that I felt awful, their message was still the same: we love you and you are what matters to us, not the car.

Mulling these words over, I felt so complete and whole in their love. I am unbelievably blessed to have parents whose love is unconditional. And then I saw the bigger picture: God's love for me is just like this, expect a million times greater, a trillion times stronger. As wonderful as my parents' love is, they are not perfect and as a result, their love itsn't either. But God's love is perfect and if I let Him, He will surrond me in His love. His love isn't dependent on what good or bad things I do, but I think it is up to each of us to decide to fully accept His love and live in it each day. It's easy to believe the lie that because I did this (fill in the blank) that I shouldn't have God's love, but He is waiting for us to let Him pour it out all over our lives. So every day, I'm going to try to let Him except, I don't want a cupful, I want a bucket.


Possibility- this one word holds so much: dreams, plans, the "what is to be" and the "what is to come"...maybe.This weekend I'm painting a bookshelf to go in my room at school. Before I bought it, I thought it wouldn't take much work- just a little paint and voila, it would be beau-ti-ful. However... 1. I'm pretty sure it grew in the car on the way home 2. it's SO dusty I don't know if it will ever be clean enough to paint it and 3. the family of wasps on my back porch keep interrupting my work..rude.but still, I can't help but think about what in the end, this bookshelf will look like and how much I'll love it in my house at school. Which got me to thinking about this next year and yes, the possibility of it all. I have quite a lot of trouble saying the dreaded "s" word (senior) and yet, I can't wait to see what this year holds. like the three before it, I'm positive it will be unlike anything else I have ever experienced. There will be late nights, road trips, talks with my roommates, dancing, laughing, singing and porch swings- that I am certain of, but the rest is still possibility. and like my bookshelf, I can't wait to see how it turns out.